Many are familiar with the heartbreaking story of Eric Clapton, 79, who faced an unimaginable loss when his young son tragically passed away in an accident.
Yet, not everyone knows about the sorrowful promise the musician made to his 4-year-old son.
“If I hadn’t checked the fax, he’d still be alive.”
Eric Clapton’s world was irrevocably altered on March 20, 1991, when his four-year-old son, Conor, died in a tragic incident.
At the time, Conor was in New York with his mother, Italian actress Lory Del Santo, when he fell from a window on the 53rd floor of a Manhattan apartment. A housekeeper had just finished cleaning, and as Conor dashed past an unlatched window, he fell to his death in a moment of sheer heartbreak.
“The window had been left open. Eric was on his way to pick Conor up,” Lory recounted.
“I heard the fax machine and went to check it before looking in on Conor. I arrived just a moment too late. He was gone. If I hadn’t checked the fax, he’d still be alive.”
Conor was only weeks away from turning five when his life tragically came to an end in a way that was incredibly heartbreaking. At that moment, Clapton was in another part of New York but rushed to the scene as soon as he received the news.
“When I informed Eric about what had happened, he was completely stunned. It was as if he had shut down entirely. He didn’t utter a word. Everything felt so surreal. When Conor passed away, it felt like the bond between Eric and me also vanished,” Lory shared.
They had bought tickets to the circus.
At the time of this devastating event, Eric Clapton and Lory Del Santo were not in a relationship. Lory had full custody of their son, and she and Conor had traveled to New York to celebrate Easter with Clapton.
On March 19, the day before the tragedy, Clapton took Conor to the circus on Long Island — it was their first full day spent alone together.
Clapton had eagerly bought circus tickets, looking forward to creating cherished memories with his son, unaware that it would be their final day together.
That afternoon, filled with the scent of sawdust, revealed to him what he had been lacking, noted biographer Philip Norman in his book, Slowhand: The Life and Music of Eric Clapton.
Upon returning to the apartment, with Conor excitedly chatting about the clowns and elephants, Eric expressed to Lory his determination to be a proper father from that moment on.
Clapton also envisioned bringing both Conor and Del Santo to London to live with him. The rock star was looking forward to spending more time with his son, having promised Conor a visit to the Bronx Zoo the following day, followed by lunch at a nearby Italian eatery. However, that morning, as Lory prepared and Conor joyfully played around the apartment, tragedy struck.
Tragically, disaster struck.
Overcome with sorrow, Clapton withdrew from the public eye.
In the days following Conor’s passing, he brought his son’s body back from New York, accompanied by Conor’s maternal relatives from Italy, to make arrangements for the funeral.
Conor was laid to rest in Clapton’s hometown of Ripley, a quaint village in Surrey, England, located about 25 miles southwest of London. This place holds significant personal meaning for Clapton, as it is where he grew up.
After the service, consumed by grief, Clapton retreated to Antigua, renting a small cottage where he spent nearly a year in solitude. He shared that he hardly spoke to anyone during that time, instead immersing himself in music as a means of coping.
When they departed, I had this small Spanish string guitar that I grew quite fond of. I traveled to Antigua, where I rented a cozy cottage in a community. There, I spent nearly a year swatting mosquitoes and playing that guitar, largely disconnected from the outside world, as I focused on healing myself,” he recounted.
During this period, music became his sanctuary. He played and reworked songs repeatedly, seeking some form of emotional release. “All I could do was play and write these songs, revising and performing them over and over until I felt I had made some progress toward understanding myself, and then I was able to emerge,” Clapton reflected.
A letter from Conor
In time, he transformed his grief into music, collaborating with Will Jennings to write “Tears in Heaven.” Initially intended for a film soundtrack, the song evolved into one of his most heartfelt and personal creations—a means to cope with his loss and honor Conor’s memory.
Amid this profound sorrow, Clapton received something that devastated him anew—a letter from Conor. Just days before the tragic accident, the young boy had penned his first letter to his father, with assistance from his mother, Lory Del Santo. The letter was sent to Clapton’s home in London but, heartbreakingly, arrived only after Conor had passed away.
Lory recalled that painful moment with clarity: “The little one had just started to write and asked me, ‘Oh mummy, how do I write a letter to daddy?’ I suggested, ‘Just write, I love you.’ He did just that, and we sent it off like any other letter.
“After Conor passed away, Eric and I traveled to London for the funeral. I was present when Eric checked his mail shortly after the service and discovered Conor’s letter inside. That moment is etched in my memory forever.”